Silent Together


My wife and I love one another enough to be silent together and pray. Unfortunately, the sacred sanity of our life together is apparently an exception. All around us, we see people who seem to lack the insight to seriously examine what they are habitually doing and adjust course if needed. Next thing you know, they crash into the rocks and start assigning blame. It happens. Most people mean well and want good things for their families, but they seem unsure of just what that entails. Sometimes they make good choices, but inconsistently. Happiness is not a random event; it requires consistent effort and a lot of prayer.

Over the years, we have discovered that a good life is a matter of less; less of what people generally admire and pursue in our culture, which means more, more freedom to be present for one another. Choosing this requires the power of discernment. Unfortunately, by the time most of us discover that we’ve chosen a less than fulfilling lifestyle, we find it nearly impossible to extricate ourselves from the tangle of habits and obligations we’ve collected over the years. Besides, almost everyone else is living the same way, so we decide to stay the same. This is a tragic mistake for a marriage.

Thank God we’ve had the time and freedom to adjust course several times along the way in our marriage, to clarify our values and put them into practice for our child’s sake. We refuse to live what ultimately amounts to an empty life. Everyone deserves better than that. So we always pray and pray, and pray some more, then listen. As a result, although our life is not perfect, it is free of turmoil and indecision. We know what we are about and where we are going. We know peace, and so does our child. We know love.

Things do not have to remain as they always have been. If you hope for something better, you can bring it about. You just have to know what you’re truly hoping for and love your partner enough to be silent together, and pray always. But it takes two. Every day I thank God for my wife and our life of peace and happiness, and I am grateful for our married friends who have been examples for us along the way. This is the secret to lasting happiness. My heart goes out to those who are unable or unwilling to love one another enough to be silent together and pray. It is the key to life.

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